We sent our Roving reporter, Dirk Digley into the dark underworld of the Dubbed Out Festival. Dirk managed to infiltrate the not so secret society on the VW scene and speak to a high priest of the infamous VW Cult.
Dirk Digley: Welcome to our show, “Breaking the VW Scene News!”
Today, we have a special guest who’s ready to open the Pandora’s box on a notorious cult known as the Volkswagen scene. Please welcome our guest, Kenny Spleens!
Kenneth: Greetings mortal souls! I have returned from the abyss to spread the gospel of the Volkswagen scene.
Dirk Digley: Kenneth, we’ve heard rumors about this cult-like following. Can you shed some light on what it’s really like to be a part of the Volkswagen scene?
Kenneth: Prepare to enter the realm of eternal debt and questionable fashion choices spending all your hard-earned money on campervan essentials like pop tops, vintage curtains, and surfboard tables. But then, it really does take a turn for the fanatic!
Dirk Digley: Erm, ok Kenneth. That sounds ominous. Can you explain?
Kenneth: Well, imagine this: you’re driving down the road, and you spot another Volkswagen enthusiast coming your way. It’s an unwritten rule that you have to wave frantically, as if your happiness depends on it. We call it the “VW wave.” It’s like we’re all part of a secret society, except the secret is out. It shows devotion to the badge. All hail the badge!!
Dirk Digley: That sounds quite bone chilling. What are some other peculiar rituals or activities within this cult?
Kenneth: Ah, where do I begin? We gather in fields, set up camp, and get drunk on cheap beer while marveling at each other’s vans. It’s like a strange mix of a tailgate party and a fashion show. And beware, if you’re not wearing a pair of crocs and a Dryrobe or congragating around the magic flamed fire and chanting songs of old, you might well be excommunicated.
Dirk Digley: That’s quite the dress code! Are there any other symbols or signs that set you apart? I’ve heard mentions of Pineapples and flamingos?
Kenneth: Of course! One of the ultimate signs of dedication is proudly displaying a Dubbed Out sticker on your van. It’s like wearing a badge of honor, showing the world that you’re a part of this wild and wonderful community. We even have secret handshakes involving spark plugs and wrenches, but that’s classified information. I too have heard tales of the upside down pineapple but this is an urban myth! Although you may want to speak to Fab Lolly Phil.
Interviewer: I’ll do that! It certainly sounds like a tight-knit group. Are there any drawbacks to joining this Volkswagen scene cult?
Kenneth: Well, your bank account might start crying a little. Those campervan essentials can quickly drain your funds, and the next thing you know, you’re selling your soul to buy vintage hubcaps fake leather seat covers. And beware the wrath of the VW gods if you dare to turn to another car brand. They will haunt your dreams forever.
Dirk Digley: Fair point, Kenneth. Very unsettling. But it seems like being a part of this cult offers a unique sense of camaraderie and adventure.
Kenneth: Ah, yes. In the midst of the madness of the vw scene, there is a twisted sense of camaraderie over the endless cost, the broken down dreams and the British weather. We bond over our shared misfortune, finding solace in the knowledge that we’re all trapped in this hellish spiral together.
Dirk Digley: Thank you, Kenneth, for giving us this disturbing glimpse into the Cult-like Volkswagen scene. It’s been an eye-opening and fascinating conversation!
Kenneth: My pleasure! Remember, if you see a Dubbed Out sticker on the road, don’t be shy—give us a wave! Join the cult… I mean, the community! Happy Volkswagen adventures, everyone! Grab your ticket here for Dubbed Out Festival and we’ll share a sacrificial beer!
